[Written days after Momocon 2012][Not releasing 11.5. My views on today's Anime Conventions still remain. Furthermore, my opinion on the whole Con =/= Consent bit is this: One, whoever came up with this was fuckin slow. Two, this PSA is late, asinine and arbitrary, if not pretentious. Three, this isn't a fuckin strip club, stop tryin to rape cosplayers and female cosplayers, stop actin like you can't get harassed. Be prepared for fuck sake. Especially for guys like me.] Mini-rant over.
The Gokaigers [that's Go-Kie- jers][look em up] taught me something; treat every battle like your last. Also I noticed a trend between me and my self-appointed Kouhai, Gekko: since my 5th anniversary[more on that later] we've done collabs based on our respective rants during convetion months. I hope this happens more often. Speaking of conventions, Allow me to gear up for battle...
"GOKAI CHANGE" -inserts ranger key in mobirates- [GOOOOOOOOOOOOOOKAIGER!!]
Now that we got that outta the way, let's put on a show.
Also, this would be a good time to clear out if you intend on opposing me like an immature 12 year-old. This fight is for mature audiences only.
For the unfamiliar, my fisrt convention was in 2006. The con of choice was Anime Weeekend Atlanta. I never thought that my first time would be at the Atlantic Southeast's Largest Anime oriented con. This convention turned a 20 year-old to a happy little schoolboy. To be blunt, some of you either don't know, or have forgotten what it feels like to be at an event that caters to you every self interest. Alot of you have turned said experience to the equivalent of a bar setting. Don't get me wrong, I've punched a number or two as well, but my main focus was to feel right at home; enjoy 3 days of tastefully not growing up and see fellow like-minded fans act accordingly. The day after the con, I would usually set a standard for how things should be from that point on. I never felt that happy since 2004. In Atlanta, there are 3 other conventions; Momocon, DragonCon, and the new kid on the block, SeishunCon. As much as I enjoy these conventions, my prejudice amongst them stays the same; AWA sets the standard, they play catch-up [funny, this elitist talk coming from a mid-20's japanophile virgin who can barely get to any of these cons let alone wear a good cosplay.] Seishun gets a pass from me, but Momo and Dragon.....ya'll in my opinion would wanna step up.
This is my 6th year in goin to conventions, Momo being the first since 2007 I attend due to the fact that it starts in march. Also in regards to it's chronological position, this is the proving grounds, and for me, if you can survive this, you can survive later ones. Since last year[2011], Seishun became no.2. Dragon became my third annual event. The thing is, Dragon is geared to all spectrums of geek culture as opposed to just anime. Sadly with that [and the overpriced admittance fees] It feels more like an elitist club; quick to weed out anyone who appears to be an initial threat [no tasteless jokes here]. Yet why do I still go? Because I have a right to feel comfotable as a geek. Then you have the "FINAL BOSS" AWA.
Lately, it's come to my attention that the much unneeded bullshit I left behind in the real world [or so I assume] has crept it's way in to these outings: resulting in them being more tolerable than enjoyable. And like a festering disease, it has affected whatever social life i have, much less the fruits of my networking post con. Ranging from oversexed cumtraps to stalkerish dickcheeses. I would assume that most of my peers have been bullied, sexually harassed, and or provoked into fear in their earlier lives, and for me personally, it's not something I wanna revisit. With what I'm seeing now, I would like to repeat a line from "The Big Bang Theory" that Penny stated
"You know, for someone who's been picked on their whole lives, you guys have become total jerks"
Some of you would respond by saying, "that sound's far too naive. get real". Well, yeah; maybe I believe that everyone should literally get along in cons and out of them afterwards. Ignorant-sounding yes, but with things as they are, alot of you can sod off with that. If one were to remove the geek and anime aspect of these outings, I would whole-heartedly refuse to go.
In regards to Momocon 2012, I enjoyed it so much, yet I'm compelled to say this; it can do better. My main purpose is to see some tokusatsu stuff and the usual bits since I first started. Upon which, this con has like many others, won me some new allies and friends. And hey, I got to see Little Kuriboh [cool guy btw]. As far as women go, they are the least of my expectations; and I don't mean that as bitches ain't shit" [oh hell no, never that, girls are awesome]. I mean in the sense of, "hmm, ok. bonus points." Of course, like high school, I make female friends alot, but that's never the reason for me going into cons, due to the fact that half of them I met outside of cons and also it's obvious what most of them are into. Though, in hindsight [HA], you can't help but notices that some of them only go by looks alone.
Now that we're in the main topic, I must say this; Since cons have somewhat become the equivalent of a bar for anime nerds and geeks, approaching someone, especially those that peek your interest has become more arduous than usual. Is it me, or is that we have adopted society's most preferred approach to strangers that peek our interest. And for those of you who want to insincerely agree with me, go fuck yourselves; just because you wanna fuck that Princess Serenity Cosplayer just because she got some nice tits, doesn't mean we're on the same side, ya fuckin daft cunt! By the way, stay the fuck away from her, she aint interested. In short, I'm not trying to excuse sloppy incompetent methods here. I'm saying that shit has gotten sour. That said, why the hell are we told to act like womanizers to attract people? I didn't go to a con to get laid, that defeats the purpose. Yeah, there are nice women in there, yeah, I wouldn't mind snatchin them up, but if I wanted to get laid, I would have started since I was sixteen. And back to you dehydrated ass motherfuckers; don't lump me in your shit. [watch, some of you females are about to agree with me too. Y'all sit the fuck down, you guys are next.] This is why I can't have nice things; you bastards. Like in episode 3 of LLCF, Just because we make some of the same fuck ups don't mean we're after the same thing. You just wanna pipe a bitch and go, I want a girl to have my last name. For fuck's sake, dude, calm the fuck down[I got this]. Also I've grown more catious about this since 2011. Which brings me to the ladies.....
Some of you are the reason guys are lookin on the internet instead of real life. "Oh his dick is hard, that must mean he's desparate for sex". Ok first off, I wanna apologize, if I'm not mr.hands off , also, I'm not sorry if I'm mr.Hands-off. But even if I play Mr. Hands-Off, just a walking penis that's dry as fuck in your minds. In the end, the first thing on my minds when I see you, even the good girls, when you see me is, "She's hot", "I wouldn't mind establishing a friendship or something meaningful for the both of us" or "please don't kill me or kick me in the junk?" There are some of us that just want your time, even if it's for the duration of the weekend [But I guess it's just sex to some of ya anyway]. Or maybe the problem is that you had so much dick shoved up every hole in your body that all you hear from us is sex. Hell you think about it more than we do. And for some of you who wanna chastise me for my shortcomings, yes I'm a hopless romantic, but I'm not as dumb as you look. Let's take it to episode 3 of LLCF then... BOOBS!! Can I PLEASE be sexually bold for a bit. Most of the time I look at your tits it's by accident. [God damn it, I'm not even trying]. I might be obsessed with em [especially big ones, -smug grin-] but the real scale tipper you should know by now.... [And I swear to God if you say "ass", I'm callin you racist].
There was one instance where a girl knew what I like physically, she went on that fact alone and tried to get both us drunk and horny... then charge me money like a prostitute.[bitch crazy] after seeing her seduce another girl's bf, I set my focus back on God Eater. What have we learned? You think you can fuck me like a bitch just because you have a nice pair? GET ALL THE WAY THE FUCK OUTTA HERE!! Apparently no one asked you what Wataru Kurenai look like? [insert scene from Pulp Fiction]
Moral of this rant, we gotta find what makes us likable to one another. And understand what got us united in the first place. The reality we live in isn't good enough. People [me in particular] go to take a break from the harsh reality, not to re-live it. If you're in touch with that, then God [or luck if you're an atheist or non Christian equivalent]bless you. And I know some of you don't like one another, but at least pay attention to what got you in this and every con worldwide in the first place. Also, If you gotta fuck [male and females] in a con, wear protection at all times. ALLL TIMES!! buy one from Little Kuriboh at least.
Ja Ane ["See ya" in Japanese]
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